"(...) todos me dicen el negro, llorona, negro pero carinoso, yo soy como el chile verde, picante pero sabroso (...)"

Here I am again. Maybe there isn't anything worthy to be written about, but I need to try, right?
I have had the time to step away from those who I held has the most endearing. I have had the time to step away from nearly everyone. And it has been good. It has been really good.
Things seem to walk into the right rythm. Things seem to be getting right. And it requires the continuity of my secret, the continuity of my silence and state-of-nearly-chronic-absence. Things require more time to myself. More time to the true healing of my soul. More time to see the passerbies. More time to see the shadows.
In the end, I'm going to be a ghost.
The ghost walks the streets of the city.
He sees their smiles and their serius faces.
He sees the masks.
He sees the cigarettes (and inhales the smell of joints in the air).

I like to step the streets of the city. I missed that place a lot.

I missed what those changex have been bringing to my life.
Freedom.
Independence, again - total, not a partial taste of it.
I missed the beauty of being a mad grown up. I missed what more can be brought by the happier times. And it'll come. Or maybe not.This time, I won't weep regreting what I could've done.

Look at the passing shadow. Fell the cold breath on your neck, the cold lips getting warm in your lips. Feel the glory. Feel.

Just feel.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Easter time: cleaning and rebirth time

Image
  This is Easter time. This is the time of rebirth like Christ Himself, the time to rise from my own ashes, like the Phoenix. And having written this, I am thinking about social media and the amount of accounts that I follow uselessly. Twitter is in worse conditions: I have followed almost 2000 accounts recently. Mostly linked to gay porn, accounts that share gay clips and certain men who share semi-nudes, teasing their viewers to buy a subscription for their OnlyFans accounts. It's useless and I followed most of them because the images were pleasant. I have even thought about getting myself an alt account, so that I could follow certain accounts freely. It happenes that my Twitter account is 11 years old, I have a massive number of people who have blocked me, including politicians and political parties in my country and I'll honestly stick to those honor badges. I'll unfollow the vast majority of people and accounts that I came to follow and stick to those whom I've re
Read more

The Blessing and the Curse of Technology

Technology is a blessing. And a curse. I am typing this message inside a very full bus. Few seats and not that much space for people doing this long hour trip on their feet. I am deactivating the cell phone's browser and Google Chrome, as I am sticking with Brave and have been for a while. And this process has been kinda painful: Google Chrome is the most used web browser and as most cell phones are part of Android universe, it's more than natural. However, it hands me a little too many ads and trying to read anything is almost certain that I'll end up hitting a surprise pop up ad. My cell phone is a Redmi, which gives me Mi Browser as a default. And although Mi browser blocks some commercials, it still allows pop ups; trying to see something on YouTube still gives me ads, despite the ad block. And although I'd like to use the easiness of Chrome or being faithful to Mi Browser, Brave wins. Wins because you block ads, because it blocks cookies without having websites ask
Read more

Following and Unfollowing

I've recently started cleaning my social media following. Again. In the last week's, I've been unfollowing a lot of accounts related with porn, leaving only those accounts that share some clips and some actors, and politics. However, I know myself and I know I'll be chasing some of those people back. From both spectrums. The thing is that anxiety makes me do it. I even follow and unfollow people that I know in a spree. My mind works in a strange way. I think that me and a certain person haven't been in each other's life for a while, so it doesn't makes sense to still follow them. As for porn or politics, I'm tired of chasing the same old thing - cock or the politicians I'm voting for - under different faces or backgrounds. So I unfollow them. Later on, I'll start following them again, because... Well, because they've been followed by me before and I liked what I saw. Things are still going down the path where I unfollow them. I'll most li
Read more