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Showing posts from June, 2012

Words are just words

So, it seems that I am in that time of my life that depressions, bad moods will come not so often, but still as strong or stronger than ever before. Still struggling with those moods, but maybe in a better way, now. Not thinking so much of them, but still paying attention to how I feel. Last two years (or are they last three years?) haven't been very easy to me, but still standing, still around.

Today, my friend Sófy went to the café after she arrives from work. She doesn't lives in Cacém, my city, but still she came to the café where we usually meet at Saturdays night.Then our friend Hélder arrived and in the middle of a conversation, after my denial on something, she told me: "everyone dreams to have his love, to fall in love, to get a boyfriend/girlfriend. Everyone pleases themselves with sex. But you keep denying all of those things to yourself. Why should you be different?" Words are just that, words!! But although she thinks she's helping me, she's only…


of so many things, that it ends up hurting me quite a lot! My time is running out in here. Half an hour goes away quite fast and it just warned me about the remaining five minutes! Who cares? Perhaps if this blog stays turned on, someone will write anything worthy, instead of how sad and depressed that person is!! I have been down in the last few days and it seems to be a never ending thing!! Parties should be parties, instead of reasons for me to be and feel depressed! Friends should be friends, instead of people who always and just tries to find out a way to fuck you up!! Even lovers should be just lovers, but they always get a way to make you fall in love for them and then they just use and abuse you!

I doubt of my ability to write and paint. I doubt of my ability to create and to feel! Perhaps, in a few days, my mood will be much better, but it's not that good! Not right now! Not today! Maybe, a man like the one in the picture would help...